How Getting Fired Changed My Life (For The Much, Much Better)

I sat in the worn out leather chair staring at the floor, my eyesight narrowing, the oxygen in the room seemingly vacuumed out. The words of the man sitting on the other side of an outdated end table still echoed in my head.

“We’ve made the decision to let you go.”

There was silence.

Then a breath. I wasn’t sure if it was my own, or if I was still holding mine.

My mind was blank.

Let me go where?

That was the first thought that crossed my mind. Am I being sent on a trip somewhere? I wondered.

It’s funny the thoughts you think when you’re in shock.

The sound from the bustling office outside of the room we sat in was nothing but incoherence. The mumbles of those who still had their job. Who wouldn’t leave with a box of framed pictures, a few books, and pen holders. Who would go home on a normal Thursday, to their normal family, and do normal out-of-the-office stuff.

But not me. I was terminated. Fired. Dismissed.

There was a crinkle. I looked up. The man who just delivered the final blow had his hand extended. In it, a white sheet officially stating my time of death. “You can see Ellen on your way out,” he said, a look of sympathy across his face. “She’ll share next steps. Also, Wendy (the office therapist) is available should you need to see her. She’s expecting you. It’s of course, optional.”

Do they think I’m unstable? I wondered. Like I’m gonna go off the rails in the place, or something?

A few minutes later I walked out of the office, exit details and severance package in hand, and called my wife. Later that night we sat with friends at a local restaurant, talking in generalities, eating free pizza, and watching our kids chase each other in the kid’s area. I was at a total loss. I didn’t know what to say, or think. For the next several days I drifted between lucid and aware to bewilderment and disbelief.

Finally, an acquaintance called me and extended an invitation to a mountain retreat he was leading later on in the month. All expense paid (because, well, I was running out of money and he knew it). I accepted because, at that point, I had nothing else to do, and I was searching for direction. A few weeks later, I boarded a plane from Indianapolis to Colorado Springs. The retreat took place 9100 feet in the mountains at a beautiful old horse ranch. The crisp mountain air and quiet nature surrounding me provided some solace from the storm I was in.

Halfway through the week, I felt the urge to get away from the ranch for a bit, hike and think, and process my predicament. An hour later, I found myself perched on a ledge looking out over a beautiful valley, the sun bathing the mountainside in radiant warmth. For the next 3 hours I wrestled with a higher power over my future. I kept saying, under my breath, that I did NOT want to return to the work I had been doing for the previous 17 years. Come hell or high water, that was not a choice I would make (even if it meant going hungry!)

I don’t know where you are spiritually, or if you believe in the supernatural but I believe there are voices that speak to us. Some call them the holy spirit, other’s call them our sub-conscience. I tend to believe they are a deeply ingrained part of our hearts and minds, speaking from our willpower, guiding and challenging us constantly.

Sitting on that rocky ledge, that small voice whispered a piercing question to me: “What do you want to do?”

I sat there for a long time (probably an hour or so) before I answered audibly.

I want to become an author. I loved writing and I loved books. It was a dream I’d had since I was a kid.

And, I want to travel the world and speak to audiences.

I want to build my own business, my own dream, and my own life.

Once I started listing all of this off, it was like the valve was turned on. It flowed out of me. The more I spoke, the greater the rush. I stopped to catch my breath, inhaling and exhaling quickly as I gazed out over the expanse in front of me.

The voice whispered again…. “What’s stopping you?”

I realized that nothing was. I had a blank canvas in front of me. For the first time in my adult life, I was in complete control of what I did next. The feeling was overwhelming. For the next few hours, I began to sketch out a plan. I decided I would come down from this mountain and begin building my dream.

In that moment, had someone told me to physically jump off that ledge, I would have been less terrified than I was right there. At that point, I had no audience, no book deal, and no one was calling me to speak at their conference. To step out on faith, into a world I was passionate about, but did not yet have traction in, was risky. But I believed in what I was being called to do.

Sometimes, the most painful, shocking moments, are the first steps toward something unimaginable and wonderful. I had no idea, sitting on the side of that mountain, dreaming of what I could do, that a freeing, deeply satisfying life awaited me beyond the opaqueness of my vision. I just had to step off the ledge.

I was terrified. The vision I had to become an author, public speaker, and online content creator was so clear and fluid, yet shrouded in self-doubt and a ton of ‘what-ifs.’

What if I failed?

What if people hated the stuff I wrote?

What if no one called and booked me to speak at their event?

What if I couldn’t make any money doing this and they shut the electricity off?

You may think these are valid questions (and maybe they are to some degree), but I’m here to tell you that what if questions are the primary tool used by mindset trolls. You know what mindset trolls are, right? They’re these little Gremlins (shout out to my Gen-X’ers!) who love to feast on our insecurities and worries. They exploit our fears and tell us lies about ourselves. They are in a constant war with the voice from our willpower, fighting for control over our minds.

Fast-forward 10 years and I can tell you this: the risk was worth it. Over the past decade since I decided to take the jump and build my own business, I have been able to travel the world and speak to hundreds of thousands of people at retreats, conferences, and seminars. I have published 6 non-fiction books, signed book deals with 4 different publishers, and most recently, published my first novel. I have built an online audience that reaches more than 300,000 readers, subscribers, and podcast listeners every month in 65 countries. I have had the opportunity to work as a coach, consultant, and freelance writer for major publications, and even an Inc. 5000 small business on the rise as one of their marketing coaches. It’s been beyond a dream.

Was it hard? Absolutely!

Did I get it all right the first time I tried it? Not even close!

Do I still have doubts and fears? 1000% yes!

Those mindset Gremlins never do actually go away. There’s not a week that goes by where I don’t hear them (sometimes very loudly). But I keep going because I’m sold on the fact that the risk is worth the reward.

I’ve never felt more free than I have over the past 10 years. I have now successfully launched and grown multiple small businesses.

While getting fired all those years ago was painful, embarrassing, and crushing, getting fired also changed my life for the much MUCH better! I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’ve opened up spots in my spring calendar to help rising entrepreneurs find the same success I found years ago. Click Here to book a free 30-minute Discovery Call with me and I’ll show you how you can grow your small business for almost free! True story.